I feel joyless and empty. I feel trapped by the snow and by everything that is happening. I have nothing to look forward to today other than falling asleep and being unconscious. I hope the weather doesn’t stop me going to Manchester on Sunday, I can’t bear not seeing my girlfriend. I hope she still loves me.
I just want to not be myself. I just want to drink and drink and drink and drink and drink and drink and drink until I hover above my head and feel happy out of my body. But I don’t do that anymore. I just want to be free.
Why did the snow have to come now? Are we cursed forever?
I want to go now. I just want to go.
Shall I type until I feel better. I’m not really thinking anything. I can hear a dog barking outside but I don’t think he should be out there. I think the neighbours are playing in their back garden, I’m sure he’s being looked after.
I think Come Dine With Me is on the telly, maybe I should watch it. Some group conflict and social discomfort might brighten my day. Who knows.
Gone now. Gone, gone, gone.
-
I must say, sticking to wine and beer is giving my alcoholism a fine longevity indeed! I’d usually be questioning every decision I’ve ever m...
-
I can’t tell you how great it is to have the temperature drop like it has. Well, I can: it’s really great! Sitting still and not sweating ...
-
Well, after the usual stuttering start, the autumnal weather seems to be here to stay. Woo! I could do with a little more sunshine though, a...
No comments:
Post a Comment