False starts, ends and promises

I was just sat in a website queue trying to put in a grocery order, so I thought I’d jot down a few quick thoughts here to kill some time. Once I left the queue, I found the site had cancelled my delivery slot and, when I went in to book a new one, all the available slots had gone. Oh well, I’ll try again tomorrow. I’m ok for basics, I just wanted to get in some fun stuff for my upcoming 40th birthday. My 30th party involved me sat alone at Cambridge train station eating an M&S egg sandwich. I kinda wanted something better for myself ten years leter. I guess not, but I’ll cope.

I had a bit of a shock yesterday when a mutual friend of myself and my ex rang using my ex’s phone. Once I’d answered, and gotten over the initial confusion, the mutual friend informed me that she was at my ex’s house and had found that my ex had overdosed on sleeping pills, antidepressants and alcohol. I initially thought she had found her too late, as she seemed to be holding back what state my ex was currently in. Turns out she was alive but, for some reason, they both felt it necessary to call me and ask what to do. I felt annoyed at this bizarre delay, but then calmly told them just to ring for an ambulance. As mentioned in my last post, my ex has recently been referred to the same mental health crisis team as myself, but I thought she was improving. As far as I know, this is the first proper attempt she has made to take her own life. I know she’s thought about it, but I don’t think she’s ever actually taken action. Anyway, she was driven to hospital and, well, I’m not entirely sure what happened there. All I know is that she was back home by the end of the day. I’m not sure what she’s been telling doctors as, surely, if she’s suicidal, they wouldn’t be prescribing her sleeping pills. They’re a classic checkout method, almost to the point of it being a cliché. Sigh. She won’t get help unless she’s more clear and concise about what’s upsetting her. I’m not convinced she’s even sure herself. Regardless, it sounds like more mobile friends than myself are now checking up on her throughout the day. I’ll give her a call tomorrow. I’d go over and keep her company, but I’m not sure how much trouble that would get me into right now, what with things being the way they are.

My old gaming buddy briefly got in touch yesterday to say, once again, that he’d be back online for a chat within 24 hours. He wasn’t. I’m not sure whether he’s doing this on purpose to keep me dangling or what. I don’t think he is, as he’s not that kind of person. I just don’t think he’s aware of how empty my life is right now. Alas! I replied, via text, that I was cancelling my online gaming subscription so, even if he did make a return to the PlayStation, I wouldn’t be able to game with him anyway. Which is true. I didn’t just say that to be dramatic. It’s been on the cards for a while. I’ve even been thinking about buying a DVD/Blu-ray player for the lounge and disconnecting the PS4 altogether. I’m just not playing that much anymore, mainly due to a lack of interest, so I was wondering whether focussing on watching movies might be more, well, mentally nourishing. My subscription runs out in just over a week so, unless I’m given a decent reason to stay, I think that’s the end of my gaming life. For the foreseeable future, at least. I really do miss my old gaming buddy’s daily company (and, let's face it, him in general), but I need to sort something else out if his absence turns out to be permanent. It certainly does look that way.

It’s all been so emotional around here!

Oh, those DVDs turned up in the post, so I’ve finally watched The Rise of Skywalker and The Man Who Killed Don Quixote. It’s been a regular Adam Driver-fest at my pad! The Rise of Skywalker was a lot better than I was expecting. It mercifully lacked the nostalgic cheese of The Force Awakens and embarrassment-factor of The Last Jedi, but it did replace both with a rather dull story. I guess final instalments in a series are usually just exercises in tying-up loose ends. Still, there were plenty of fun character moments and striking visuals, plus I actually felt quite moved by the end. Basically, it didn’t let me down as it seems to have let others down. Perhaps my expectations were so bedrock-low that my appreciation had nowhere to go but up. The scenes with Princess Leia were the only parts that jarred, for obvious reasons. I wonder whether I’d have noticed had I not been aware that Carrie Fisher had died prior to the film’s production. I guess we’ll never know. Would be funny to cut in moments of her from When Harry Met Sally in place of the unused footage from previous Star Wars films though. Erm, respectfully, of course. Although I'm sure she'd love it. So, yes, if you’re avoiding The Rise of Skywalker because you’ve heard bad things, then take it from me that it’s actually a solid, entertaining and often very funny science fiction adventure. Dare I say it - it could very well be the best Star Wars film we’ve had in forty years. Hmmm, I may have to retract that statement after my second viewing.

Moving onto The Man Who Killed Don Quixote, this week I found myself pleasantly relieved for the second time! I feel like I’ve won a prize. As planned, I did watch Lost in La Mancha again right beforehand, which I heartily recommend doing, as there are some amusing references to Terry Gilliam’s aborted 2000 production (the subject of Lost in La Mancha) in the final film. I was primed for the successful 2018 version by the time the DVD started. I must admit, I was expecting something grander, but the charm of this seemingly-modest production won me over. Jonathan Pryce didn’t quite look the part of Don Quixote but, gosh darned it, he made up for it with some great acting! I appreciated the fact that Gilliam probably wanted to cast a reliable long-time collaborator as Quixote, given the problems he had with Jean Rochefort on the original production. In fact, when I first heard that Pryce had replaced Rochefort, I smiled knowingly to myself, as I knew exactly why. Adam Driver continues to impress us, this time with his portrayal of a cynical film director who slowly begins to see the world through the eyes of the lovably barmy Don Quixote. Driver has a power that really leaps off the screen. He commands quiet, languid moments and violent, bombastic outbursts with equal aplomb. The film’s narrative is, unsurprisingly, a little on the confusing side at times, but I’m guessing a few more watches will fix that. Its habit of jumping back and forth between fantasy and reality is something that can’t really be avoided when dealing with Cervantes’ novel. I’m hoping to pick up the audiobook where I left off pretty soon. It’s notoriously long, and my attention span is short. After that, I just need to catch up on all the Terry Gilliam films I’ve not seen since Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. As with David Cronenberg’s oeuvre, I’m terribly behind, and I really have no excuse. But, back to the film, please do track down a copy and support the film as best you can. Well, if you’re able to find a copy, that is. As mentioned in my previous post, I had to settle on a German DVD due to distribution problems. I believe the curse of Quixote leapt on Gilliam again only after the film was completed, with someone involved in the 2000 production claiming they were owed money from this version. Probably best not to think about it. Just enjoy the movie! Oh and if you haven’t fallen in love with Joana Ribeiro by the end of the film then, erm, you’re a much stronger person than I.

Here’s the episode of my old podcast where I discuss Lost in La Mancha in, I assume, greater detail:



This week I also finished off my 1-5 boxset of King of the Hill, which I’m a bit sad about. It did pick up by the end, but I don’t think I’ll be pursuing any further seasons. Unless you can convince me otherwise, that is. I’m now watching a bit of Will & Grace in bed, as a placeholder, until I can settle on another comedy series to end each day on.

Right, folks, I think that’s all for my “quick” update. I needed to get a few things off my chest before bed, I think. I’ll either fire up the Don Quixote audiobook after the telly’s switched off or, as I have been doing recently, listen to a nonfiction history title. I’ve been working my way through one about ancient Mediterranean civilisations. It’s light, but still interesting. And long. Very, very long.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!