Massive stripper titties

Goodness knows where I am in terms of my awake-sleep cycle right now. I believe I was still awake around 5 pm yesterday, then finally drifted off until around 9 pm. This means I’m technically sleep deprived, but my body has definitely had enough for now. Even though I, me, the person that matters, certainly has not. But, hey, what can you do?! I’m now really regretting taking booze off that grocery order, but maybe I’ll buy some in separately after the supermarket delivery dude has been and gone.

Saying that, I still need to complete my four-day blood pressure log, cook my homemade curry, pick up medication, ring for those blood test results, and maybe get some energy meter top-ups. Sigh. When it rains, it pours, am I right?!

Or… hear me out here… I could just blow all that shit off and just get wrecked after my groceries turn up in 6 hours.

My justifications for this “friendlier” plan are a) if I hand in my blood pressure log on Friday there’s a very real chance nothing will be done with it until Monday anyway b) I could cook the curry quickly in the morning and freeze all of it, as I don’t enjoy drinking on a full stomach c) I don’t give a fuck what the blood test results say c) that medication can and will wait and d) my meter levels might be ok for now.

So, yeah, I might just go with that.

If you’ve not experienced true sleep deprivation, then you can’t understand how painful it is. It has literally been used throughout history as a form of torture.

Of course, my weekly binge may not solve my sleep pattern problem, as the hangover may be so bad that I just end up oversleeping and find myself back where I started.

Anyway, the point I’m trying to get across is that me and my body are not getting along right now, but that doesn’t mean we don’t love you.

I really shouldn’t say “curry” should I? I mean, it’s a dish, not an entire cuisine. Oh I don’t know. I can start making it when I start drinking, let it cool down while I get more and more out of it then, hopefully, be mentally competent enough later to dish it all out into separate tubs and move them over to the freezer without any accidents.

Smash cut to my building being on fire.

What a laugh, hey?

Well, I’ve ordered those Bill & Ted movies, along with Season 4 of Rick and Morty. While watching 3 again, I realised that, actually, some of the show’s highlights are contained within that season. I think I just don’t like how self-aware Rick becomes. By the time the show gets round to Season 3, he’s gone from being a loveably eccentric grandpa accidentally putting his grandson in harms way, to being uncomfortably aggressive and constantly being referred to and referring to himself as “a god” and “the smartest person in the universe”. He also manages to get out of every bad situation he finds himself and Morty in, no matter what it is and no matter how lazily convenient the solution is. This makes him and the show less interesting, even though individual scenes are funny and interesting.

Infallible characters are just boring. This is a fact.

Regardless, the Blu-ray should turn up later on today, around the time I’ll have finished the 1-3 boxset. Fingers crossed the quality is retained/improved. I don’t want miracles, just good writing.

We shall see.

I began watching Innerspace yesterday. This is a film I probably haven’t seen since I was a teenager, maybe even a kid. It stars one of my favourite people and one of my least favourite people. The former being Wendy “Francine Smith” Schaal and the latter being Martin Short AKA Budget Robin Willians. I find Short’s frantic energy rather threatening, and his semi-comeback in the past decade has truly baffled and annoyed me. He’s always a major distraction and takes you out of whatever he appears in. I’m sure he’s a lovely person, but that sure doesn’t come across on screen.

Wendy Schaal is just amazing in everything she does, which requires no more explanation from me.

Anyway, back to Innerspace! Yeah, so, it’s an oddly paced film to begin with. There’s very little useful dialogue to speak of (no pun intended), to the point where it almost feels like a silent film. This actually works, as Joe Dante’s command of the language of cinema really needs no words to back it up. Things were getting a little more dialogue-heavy where I left off, I think as Short and Quaid's characters are having down-time and getting drunk. I like that Henry Gibson plays a likeable character for a change. He was rather typecast as a creepy, monosyllabic villain for decades, so his caring supermarket manager in this is actually a nice departure. I chuckled when I realised one of the villains is Vernon Wells, best known from Mad Max 2 and Commando. He’s also in Fortress with Christophe(r) Lambert, which is fun but cheap as fuck. Meg Ryan hasn’t done much in the film yet, but she’s always charming enough. Well, she was until she messed her career up by sassing Britain’s beloved Michael Parkinson. Bad move, sister. Bad move. Can you imagine someone from Britain going over to America and being a total dick to Oprah Winfrey?! Yeah, you think about that. 

Erm… where was I?! Oh yeah…

Basically, I just got too tired halfway though watching the film, so decided to try and call it a “night”, even though it was midday and the sleep thing didn’t end up panning out. Well, I’ll hopefully pick up where I left off after posting this, so I’ll let you know my overall feelings some other time.

Wow, that was a long ramble for something I’ve only half-watched. Isn’t life crazy?!

Oh those presents I sent to my brother have apparently been delivered, but he’s not said anything about them yet. Perhaps he’s waiting until he’s opened them on his birthday proper. Which is today. Well, later on today. I deleted his number from my phone, due to concerns over me emotionally drunk texting him, so I’ll have to wait for him to contact me. I guess I could email him. Hmmm, yeah, I might do that after proof reading this.

Does “proof reading” need hyphenating?! It sure feels like it does.

I’ve been getting loads of views on my old blog, The Whittling Post, this week. I do sometimes get spikes in activity, but what makes this interesting is the variety of countries and posts that have been viewed. I’m still shocked that I get more views on a blog I no longer update than this one. Take a look at this!

It’s a mystery. Perhaps they’re all spybots and I’ve unintentionally said something that threatens international security. Perhaps somebody’s posted a link to the blog on social media. Perhaps anal-probing aliens are tracking me down to burrow away into my sweet, tender behind. Only time will tell. Or not.

Right, well, I think I’m done here for now. I’ll let you know how the rest of the day pans out at… erm… some point. It all depends on what I decide to achieve*.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!

*drink